Last week Phil and I celebrated ten years of marriage – woot! Makes me feel like I should have some advice for all the newlyweds out there. Truth is, I’m still taking it one day at a time, learning new things as I go. You can’t possibly know everything there is to know about someone before you marry them – and this can be a good thing!
It’s strange to forever associate or wedding day with 9/11. Yup – we got married on the 15th of September, just a few days after the attack on the Two Towers. At our reception, we honored my grandparents on their 60th anniversary, who got married the same year as Pearl Harbor. I felt so guilty getting married, continuing with my life almost as though nothing had happened. But you know what? Life Goes On. There were a number of friends and family members who were unable to attend our wedding due to the lack of flights, and it’s a good thing we had already planned on honeymooning in nearby Nantucket, MA because we wouldn’t have been flying anywhere.
I spent my anniversary by myself. Phil was working a 24-hour shift, and Meme had the grandkids. I didn’t really know what to do with myself! Were it my birthday, I may have done a little shopping, maybe gotten a small box of chocolate truffles. I felt the need to somehow celebrate, but it didn’t feel right without my husband. In honor of the fact that I had a carrot cake muffin on my wedding day, I had a piece of homemade carrot cake (recipe courtesty of Nourishing Traditions) and got an iced coffee from Dunkin’ Donuts. Then I drove around aimlessly, trying to figure out what to do.
Later in the day, I decided to whip up a homemade gift for Phil. I’m usually on top of these things – and had already gotten a special package deal from Omaha Steaks through Plum District – but I like to do something special if I can. Last year for Valentine’s Day I made a little love book from a deck of cards, so my idea for making a love jar filled with 365 thoughts and sentiments felt a bit too similar. Instead, browsing around and inspired by some of my favorite craft sites, I decided to make a simple scrapbook album with one picture for each year of marriage.
I didn’t go crazy matching and coordinating elements, but it still took a while to pick the pictures, print them, cut and assemble the book. I interspersed the photos with the Bible verses, songs, and readings from our wedding, along with a couple others to fill the book. I like how it turned out!
We walked down the aisle, each of us escorted by our parents, to Bebo Norman’s A Page Is Turned.
My sister sang I Will Love You, by Kathy Fisher. I forget where I first heard the song, but I fell in love with it and had to have it in the ceremony.
One of my favorite passages in the Bible about the passion between husband and wife is in Song of Solomon, when the writer says “Arise, my darling; my beautiful one, come with me… My lover is mine and I am his… Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away.”
Another favorite verse about love, loyality, devotion is found in Ruth chapter 1 – “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God…”
We danced our first dance to Kenny Chesney’s “Me and You,” special to us since we dated and fell in love listening to his songs.
I don’t remember where I found it or who said it, but I put the following quote in one of our wedding albums. It really resonated with me; there were some people who tried to discourage our relationship, tried to tell us how our relationship should look, and when it all comes down to it it’s between us and God.
“Marriage is the clasping of hands,
the blending of hearts,
the union of two lives as one.
Your marriage must stand,
not by the authority of the state
nor by the words of the minister,
But by the strength of your love
and the power of faith
in each other and in God.”