Early Potty Training

Infant potty training, potty whispering, elimination communication – call it what you will.  There are many names for this practice which seems to be a growing trend… and yet… this is the way things were done before the convenience of disposable diapers. 

I cloth diapered my first baby on and off, and have done so exclusively with my second since he was a few months old, so I’m familiar with many of the more natural methods surrounding all things potty-related.  I became especially interested in elimination communication (EC) when I discovered that one of my cousins was practicing this with her baby.  When they came to visit, her baby was maybe six or seven months old, and her diaper was already staying dry for a large portion of the day.  Of course, this sounded wonderful to me!  Using cloth diapers provides an extra parental incentive for wanting to catch those nasty diapers before they occur.  But wait till you read about the many other benefits of EC.

I decided to start Josiah on the potty around the same time I started him on cloth diapers, and it just so happened to be when it started getting warmer so I was able to keep him diaper-free at times.  I didn’t stress myself out with rigid schedules, just put him on the potty at specific times - before and after nursing or meals, before and after nap- and bedtimes, before going out and upon returning home.  He never really gave me any specific signals that he was going potty or about to go potty in his diaper, so that provided an extra challenge.  If Gwen or I used the potty, I would put him on as well.  In fact, it was the start of Josiah’s potty-training that motivated Gwendolyn to get out of her diapers once and for all.  If Josiah could use the potty, so could she!  A definite win-win in my book.

In the beginning, I employed a cueing sound when putting Josiah on the potty, which not only provides a verbal correlation to what he was doing or was supposed to be doing on the potty, but also makes it more fun when they get older.  Potty songs are da bomb for an older baby as well.  High praise was given when successful – much clapping and rejoicing (and perhaps some dancing) ensued.  These all help to affirm the correct responses.  I practice simple baby signing with both kiddos, and now that Josiah’s spoken vocabulary is expanding, we now communicate in this way rather than cueing (although we often revert to it for the sole purpose of silliness – c’mon, just try not to smile when making pooping noises).

I wish I had started earlier with EC, and if we have another I will attempt to start from birth.  The idea of going diaper-free is exciting – imagine not having to buy all those diapering supplies and do all that laundry??  Recently Josiah got a yeast infection, and one of the ways of treating it was just letting him air out, go without a diaper for as much as possible.  It got me thinking – why not let him stay that way all the time, at least while we’re at home?  Once again, this has been more easily accomplished since the weather has gotten nicer, especially when the kiddos are outside a lot. 

I was putting pants on him without a diaper, and was thrilled to realize all of his poops were going into the potty!  I decided to look for some baby undies online, since it’s hard to find small sizes in stores, and found a comprehensive listing of websites that offer undies and training pants specifically for EC- families - but man, are they expensive!  I finally went to Diaper Swappers, one of my old standbys, and found a listing for a whole bunch of 18-month undies.  I got so excited over tiny toddler undies!  Now, during the day I keep Josiah in his big-boy undies, and use his cloth diapers for going out and bedtime.  The next step will be trying to forego diapers at naptime – wish me luck! 

Just like walking, talking, and other things your baby learns over time, it takes patience, guidance, and consistency.  And don’t get discouraged when you’re not “successful” overnight!  This is one of the biggest things I see when people attempt sign language with their babies – they may keep at it for a couple weeks, but then they give up because they’re not getting a response.  Even if you don’t get an immediate reaction, it doesn’t mean you’re not making progress!  Those little brains are making connections.  Do you stop speaking to your baby because he or she can’t speak by 3 months?  Of course not – you realize that some things take time to develop, and your baby often understands a lot more before he or she can effectively communicate.   

There isn’t any one way to practice EC and you see variety all across the board - from those whose babies are completely diaper-free to those part-timers who perhaps utilize disposables but put their babies on the potty.  Though it may be best to start from birth and employ specific methods, it’s never too late to start!  Here are some excellent tips for those starting with an older baby.

EDIT: I found a copy of Diaper Free Baby at a consignment shop and snatched it up.  It makes for an excellent, informative read.  It also lists some great resources for finding cloth diapers, small trainers, potties, and other EC gear.  Many cloth diapering and online retailers of baby items have jumped on the CD and EC bandwagon, so some of these items aren’t hard to come by if you go looking around.  Here are some they cite, in addition to others that I’ve come across and those listed in my cloth diapering post:
DiaperWare
The EC Store
Gap – small undies
Hanes - toddler undies

My Journey with Cloth Diapers

There are as many opinions about cloth diapers as there are cloth diapers themselves and the myriad of accessories!  I have tried a number of kinds with my two kiddos, and have been meaning to write a comprehensive post about my opinions for a while now.  Kelly’s Closet has a good run-down on the four basic types of cloth diapers and some examples of each.

In addition to some other online shops, Diaperswappers.com (DS) has been an indispensable online resource for me.  Here you can browse forums to buy and sell new or used diapers and accessories, as well as baby carriers and any other baby, kid, and parenting paraphernalia you can think of. 

When I had my daughter three years ago, I knew I wanted to try cloth diapering but was unsure which method I would prefer.  Even the types that I purchased new have since changed their styles; everything evolves so quickly these days!  I purchased a bunch of random items from DS, as well as some new bumGenius one-size pocket diapers and Haute Pocket one-size diapers (both with the aplix-style closure).  The latter I only allowed myself because I had gotten some gift money, and decided to splurge!  Ironic, because these are some of the less-expensive types out there. 

Among the random assortment that I tried were newborn Kissaluvs fitted diapers with misc. covers (I had read good reviews), newborn All-Together-Deluxe AIO now known as OsoCozy, newborn Kushies AIO, small Wonderworks/Magic-alls AIOs (this brand has since been discontinued, but you can still find them all over the place), small and large gDiapers (I think I got mine from a craigslist ad), OS Baby Love (got mine from Amazon like the listing), and a slew of second-hand diaper inserts/liners and cloth wipes. 

I have always loved baby products that are designed to outlast infancy – convertible cribs, infant/toddler carseats, bouncy seat that later becomes a toddler rocker, etc.  So, naturally, the one-size diapers appealed to me since they’re adjustable to be used right through potty training.  However, I did not like how bulky these one-size diapers were on my newborn.  It didn’t help that we brought her home around 5 pounds, so everything seemed huge on her! My favorite diaper at the time were the Wonderworks AIOs; its nifty over-snap feature allowed me to cinch the diaper tightly, and since she remained on the small side I was able to use these for quite a few months.  I didn’t have many of these, however, and alternated with disposables. 

I found the Kissaluvs left her entire middle section too moist; anywhere the diaper covered would seem red and irritated.  I quickly resold those on DS!  I thought I would like the other AIO style diapers since I liked the Wonderworks so much, but the Kushies were narrow in the crotch and didn’t have much coverage, the ATD seemed to leak around the edges, and the Baby Love had a horrible fit no matter how big she got. 

I loved the concept of the gDiapers, but found too many cons associated with this type.  First, the flushable insert was just a hassle and ended up clogging our toilet.  It was frustrating trying to put the diaper on correctly and then proceed to fasten the Velcro in back.  Furthermore, the diaper almost always leaked, which meant I couldn’t just change the insert and liner – I had to change the whole diaper.  Too complicated a process for me!  I did try other reusable inserts in the liner, which I liked better than the disposable, but still ended up selling them on DS. 

As she got bigger, I finally broke out the bumGenius and Haute Pockets, and used them on and off with disposables.  I liked that I could stuff extra inserts inside as needed, and they fit quite nicely as she chubbed up a bit.  However, I don’t know if it was the way I washed them or if I was doing something wrong, but the outer layer always seemed to get moist and leak through her clothing.  Since I didn’t want to spend anymore money on cloth diapers, I went back to disposables most of the time.  When she started potty training, I found the were okay as a naptime diaper for small accidents, but that’s about it.

Fast-forward to baby #2.  I decided to use disposables through the newborn stage, but somewhere along the line I heard about a new, OS hybrid diaper called the Flip system.  I was super-excited, and got a package on sale.  I fell in love at once, and wished they had this sooner!  The cover fits snugly and nicely under clothing.  And one of my favorite aspects about the system is that I can change out the inserts and just wipe the cover clean if it doesn’t get dirty.  And I don’t have to stick with the inserts that come with the package, I can use prefolds and Cotton Babies has an excellent return policy and I was able to get them replaced with their newer versions which have all reinforced snaps.  I haven’t had a problem since.

 Other covers I’ve tried: OS Blueberry Coveralls, OS Marvels Cover by Kissaluvs, and OS Wonder Wraps.  The Marvel’s snaps were similar to the Thirsties Duo – it had a wonky fit and I couldn’t tighten them.  Not only that, I found that one of the snaps kept coming undone, and when I examined it more closely found three snaps were broken at the base.  Luckily, I was able to return the cover to Amazon.  The Blueberry and Wonder Wraps have since been added to my collection as favorites, along with the flip covers – the BB has all reinforced snaps and leg gussets to contain any blowouts, and the WW has a soft, durable fabric with “a totally unique channeled wait elastic allowing [it] superior stretch and fit.”  Wonder Wraps have been discontinued; I purchased mine on Baby Half Off during one of their sales.  I currently rotate the covers for my 1-year-old, and use them with prefolds during naptime for my 3-year-old.  I’m curious to try some different prefold folding techniques, but I need to get some snappis first since I don’t feel like using pins.  EDIT: Now that I’ve been converted to a prefold/cover system and have an older baby, I would love to try some fitteds like the Kissaluvs I initially tried in the newborn size.  I wonder if they would be really bulky under a cover, or if the leg openings would peak out. 

I can’t bear the thought of using cloth wipes on really dirty dipes, so I use disposable ones from time to time.  If I use disposable wipes for wet bums and other minimal clean-up, I launder and re-use as diaper liners to eliminate scraping poo into the toilet (my least-favorite part of CDing).  I do, however, use cloth wipes most of the time, and purchased a bunch from soap bits for cloth wipes solution are da bomb, too, but if I run out of those I make a homemade solution.

I rotate two large zippered wetbags, which I have hanging in the bathroom.  My favorite is from Monkey Foot Designs on Etsy, and the other is a Planetwise wetbag.  Wet liners go in the bag as-is.  I clean off as much as I can from the dirty liners (and covers, if necessary), spray with stain remover, and throw into the wetbag.  When it’s full, I hang a new wetbag and wash the dirty ones.  My normal wash routine is to do a cold-water rinse (sometimes with baking soda), then a hot wash on the heavy cycle (currently I’m using homemade detergent, but I’ve used all kinds with good results).  On nice days the wash goes on the line; otherwise covers are air-dried and inserts go in the dryer.  EDIT: The lining of my My Monkey Food Designs wetbag has slowly been deteriorating.  I still rotate it with the other but would probably get a new bag altogether if I were diapering full-time.

CDing on the go used to scare the hell out of me, quite honestly, but it’s really not that bad.  I have a medium zippered wetbag with two compartments, so one pocket holds clean supplies and the other contains any dirty ones. 

I do sometimes worry about family members or people in church nursery not wanting to deal with cloth, but it hasn’t posed a problem for me.  My husband would opt for disposables when we were diapering our first, but now that we only do cloth he just rolls with it (although he’s not usually the one to do it, so sometimes he needs a gentle reminder on technique).  He’s proud of the fact that I choose something that’s healthy (my baby stopped getting diaper rashes when we switched exclusively to cloth) and economical.  He’s also proud of my consistency with potty-training the kiddos; now my 14-month-old will often go into the bathroom when he needs to go!  It doesn’t work all the time, but it never ceases to amaze me how much they comprehend.

I would highly recommend cloth diapering and love talking about it with other mamas.  I feel it’s right on up there with other healthy, natural choices such as breastfeeding, babywearing, and eating less-refined foods.  EDIT: Mosey on over to my friend Ashley’s blog for a good list of reasons why to consider cloth diapering: the cloth diaper argument. 

Of course, there are those days when I wonder, “why am I doing this again?”  It seems so much easier to throw a disposable diaper in the trash and not worry about it.  But the easy way isn’t always the best way.

Some of my favorite online resources for cloth diapering and beyond:
Diapers.com
Diaperswappers
Eco Baby Buys
Kelly’s Closet
Nicki’s Diapers
Swaddlebees clearance
Wee Essentials

Diapers/accessories I would love to try:
Best Bottom one-size diaper system (snaps)
Mommy’s Touch one-size diaper cover
Tetro fitted diapers
Weehuggers covers (snaps)

Tetro Cloth Diapers

In my quest for The Perfect Cloth diaper, I stumbed across this beaut: the Tetro Cloth Diaper.  I haven’t heard much about them, but would love to try the fitteds.  Visit Snaps & Snails and check out their products.

9 Months: Stick a fork in me, I’m done

Technically, I’m 36 weeks minus one day… but who’s counting? Oh, wait… I am! I can’t believe I’m 9 months pregnant, with [at least] one more month to go. Why do They say pregnancy is nine months? Arrrrgh! I should be done by now. I suppose it’s a good thing I’m not, because the house isn’t ready.

My belly-button hasn’t popped, and perhaps it won’t, but you can see by these pictures that I should be done SOON!

    

I haven’t written an update in a little while, because I’ve been busy running around to doctors’ apts. For those of you who don’t frequent Facebook, here’s the most recent Concern:

6:22pm Tuesday, Oct 16 – Another Baby [Bump] In the Road
I had my weekly apt at Women & Infants’ for the ultrasound/measurements. The doctor came in after the tech was done, and said the numbers looked fine. Phew! She doesn’t have anemia.

He was then kind enough to tell me that, based on the measurements, she weighs in at 4lbs 2oz… and I couldn’t help but notice that she weighed exactly the same last week, and mentioned in passing that it seemed odd and did it matter? He said that I wasn’t told how big she was last week, and I informed him that, yes, I asked the technician how far along I was measuring (even last week, she was measuring small) and she said the baby weighs 4lbs 2oz, at least a week off my due date. He went out of the room and got some other records, and said they shouldn’t have told me last week, I guess it’s not the week to week number that you look at, but every other week? *shrugs* Probably just trying to make me feel better. But he asked if I had had any non-stress tests (nope), and said – well, you’re gonna have ‘em now! One today, later in the week, and twice a week from now on… in addition to my weekly ultrasounds and bi-weekly (soon to be weekly) prenatal apts.

I asked him IS THIS BAD that she’s measuring small – why do they always skirt around my concern? He admitted that it’s not great, and that I probably have an “inefficient placenta.” What causes this? Well… smoking, high blood pressure… nothing that I do/have… so it’s some unknown reason. Of course – nothing I can fix. So… no matter that I’ve already gained 40+ pounds, it seems I can’t adequately feed my baby with my stupid placenta. Normally, that would seem like a funny sentence to me… but boy am I pissed with the way my body has behaved my WHOLE FRICKIN’ LIFE!!! As I’m leaving, he keeps joking around, “Tell that baby to grow!” Thanks…

Mom and I thought maybe there’s a silver lining to this whole placenta thing – perhaps it’s inefficiency is preventing the harmful antibodies in my blood from passing over to the baby. In any case… I’m… just so tired. Tired of this, tired of constantly worrying about my baby, feeling that I’m a horrible mother already because I can’t even provide a nurturing growing environment for my baby. That’s what it’s supposed to do!

FUCK.
*********Pardon my French, by the way – I was upset *********
So… they’ve been monitoring the baby’s size and condition via weekly ultrasounds and bi-weekly non-stress tests, and continuing to monitor my blood for increasing antibodies on a weekly basis. At my visit today (see last picture in post), Baby passed with flying colors. She’s still small – at 4lbs 11oz she’s only gained 9oz in almost two weeks. For some reason, I’m the only one concerned. I keep getting assured that they’re monitoring the baby, yadda yadda… but can’t anything happen in the few days between visits? I dunno. It seems I have to ask the right questions, take care of myself, because I can’t rely on the experts.

Fancy abbreviations I’ve learned (these are some random links about each one, but they’re are tons of resources out there):
IUGR – Intrauterine Growth Restriction (or Retardation)
SGA – Small for Gestational Age
AIF – Amniotic Fluid Index
NST – Non-Stress Test

In addition, I’m going to regular now-weekly prenatal visits (where I get to learn that my doctors don’t communicate very well, I’m almost 200 pounds, not eating nutritiously, and now under House Arrest and not allowed to work and contribute to our income). I think that just about sums it up.

How have I been spending my time now that I need to REST? Well… the other night, I “snuck” out and attended another baby shower thrown by Nichole and Katherine – it was AWESOME! it was much more intimate with just a few friends, but smashing food, decorations, favors, and special touches. I felt SO special, and had a great time. Hoping to post some pictures once Dan sends the ones from his digital cam. *HINT HINT*

And of course there’s always the internet. You know how when you buy in bulk, you have to initially spend money to save money? Sucks at first, but gets better in the long run? I plan on giving cloth diapering a try, and have been spending oodles of time trying to find good deals online since we’re plum outta cash right now (our regular bills and trying to finish the addition before the Big Day are sucking us dry). I’m happy to say that, although I’m really not certain what I’ll need by way of sizes and total supplies for each item, I have a nice little stash that should last for a little while. I may have quite a bit of laundry to do… but hey, I won’t be working! (pause) Well, not getting paid for it, anyway. For those interested – and it really is fascinating, how technical the newer versions and their accessories are – here are some that I currently have and/or plan on getting in the mail soon (some of them used): BumGenius, Haute Pockets, Baby Love, and Kissaluvs.

So, what makes this all worth it?